Intrusive Thoughts

I'm historically heartbroken Drowning in my own emotions One minute away from breaking down, down, down I'm always leaving empty-handed No one wants a heart that's damaged Only know a love that lets me down, down, down, oh Staring contest with the walls I'm giving into my intrusive thoughts What if I never find anybody to love Or I finally get the chance and I fuck it all up? 'Cause I can't get hurt if I'm the first one to leave Whoa, what if I get to heaven, and it's not even real And I die before telling you how I really feel? 'Cause it feels like hell and I just can't help but think That maybe love's not for me If you don't look too closely You can't even tell I'm lonely Even though it keeps me up at night, night, night, night Tryna keep myself distracted But I get all these awful habits Of listening to voices in my mind, mind, mind, oh Staring contest with the walls I'm giving into my intrusive thoughts, oh What if I never find anybody to love Or I finally get the chance and I fuck it all up? 'Cause I can't get hurt if I'm the first one to leave? Whoa What if I get to heaven, and it's not even real And I die before telling you how I really feel 'Cause it feels like hell and I just can't help but think Maybe love's not for me, oh-oh Maybe love's not for me, oh-oh Maybe love's not for me Maybe love's not for me For me, for me, for me Maybe love's not for me